to clarify your news...

Still a whole lot of nothing going on. More hours get cancelled than I actually work. Which for this month I can kind of handle, because I'm insisting on still being paid for them. But that does nothing for my current state of boredom.

There are a lot of car accidents in Turkey, I think TR ranks the #2 or #3 in the world for the most accidents. Watching these people drive its no wonder why. I am no longer nervous in the car. Most accidents in Istanbul are fender benders, small stupid accidents. Yesterday when I was waiting for the chauffer I saw one across the street from where I was standing. It automatically meant that my driver would be another 15 minutes at least.

On the way home yesterday my driver was in a small scrape up with a taxi. It took 1/2 an hour before we could go anywhere, blocking traffic the whole time, sitting in the hot unmoving car. Not much for excitement. I can tell ya though that I wished I wasn't wearing long pants and a black, mid-length sleeved synthetic blouse.


On a different note, I've caught wind of some alarming news in the US about Turkey.
This week I spoke with the General Manager of a news channel about it. I'm not exactly sure what you're seeing on your television, I've seen a little on this end. But to clear up any confusion, what is being broadcasted as 'violence' is not violence nor a real problem. It is a "what if" scenario - imaginary - with no real basis - being thought up by American think tanks. There's a lot of hype about the upcoming elections in July. And its just that, hype. Turkey's secularism is not in danger. In the last few months there were a few protests, every healthy democracy needs them. And yes Turkey is dealing with a terrorist issue - because the terrorists don't like Turkey's secularism. The rest of the Muslim world says that Turkish people are not real Muslims, because they don't follow Islam the way the Koran says they should.

Turkey is a progressive developing country, foreign investors would not be throwing their money into this country if it were a political risk. And that's exactly what's happening, to the point that the Turkish Lira is expected to become equal in value with the US Dollar by the end of the year. (Currently the exchange is 1 YTL = 1.3 USD.)

Just in case you needed this cleared up....

Is there a battle that can be won?

The water was out for awhile today. So was the electric. The water I expect, due to the shortage of precipitation through the winter months. Luckily we have a fair sized reservoir for that problem.

However work was also cancelled for me today. I was informed 15 minutes before I was to leave. Its really getting old, and its only been 6 weeks!! I'm giving my revamped CV to a headhunter soon, we'll see what happens. I'm also meeting with a young woman who's starting a language center here to see if I can help with setup and administration.

I know there's money to be made, its just a matter of entrepreneurship and patience. I lack a bit of both of them. I'm an intense person who likes to intensely work on projects and see the results.

So I sat around bored today. The evening offered a little bit of "excitement" with the ongoing battle with the ants. I hate the ants. I just want them to leave my house.

I'd be happy with a battle that I could win sometime soon. I've been enduring an ongoing battle inside of me, between trying to begin building a career and a stable life and saying fuck it to it all and continuing the life of a broke ass nomad world traveler and moving on to someplace else to see what happens next.

I guess the only thing saving me are momentary periods of satisfaction which are becoming farther and fewer between. I don't know what will win out in "the end" or if there is such a thing as "the end".

A missed chance at stardom

I missed possibly my one and only chance to be on television and I have no regrets about it.

Last week while Super A and I were out for a walk in a touristy part of the city, we were approached by a small group of people asking us if we'd do an interview (in front of a tv camera) about a foreign woman and a Turkish man living together in a serious relationship. We agreed. It was a short 5 minute interview (in Turkish of course). They said they were doing a t.v. show. I was thinking it was a documentary style show...

I was a little off in my perception. It is a reality tv show, a contest between couples. He would have to film me for A MONTH, not a day like I suspected. They wanted to give him a camera to film me for a month making dinner (Turkish meals), cleaning, serving him, etc. to show how a foreign woman adapts into Turkish society.

When we got home and spoke about it, we agreed, NO WAY!!! How humiliating! Our new apartment is, ahem, crap, unlike our old one. We couldn't imagine putting it on national television. Plus, we share the household responsibilities (sometimes he does more than me even). There's also a safety factor to consider: I'm a stand-out "yabanci" (=foreigner in Turkish) with my short hair and am picked up daily by a chauffer in car driven by a media company. What a kidnapping that would be!

He irons better than me. He cleans better than me. He hand washes clothes better than me. And the man who was afraid of the washing machine in October runs the damn thing better than me . Often he cooks better than me. Not to mention my principles.

"You want coffee? It's in the kitchen."

"You want me to do WHAT? I think you need to find yourself a different
girlfriend."

"If you like long hair so much find another girlfriend."

This week while I was cleaning the balcony the landlady popped her head out of the upstairs window to praise me cleaning.

So we turned down the opportunity at public humiliation. A shot at 50K is one thing, but I don't enter such a contest unless I know I will win. And I know I wouldn't. I'm not up for raw deals.

Making an ass of myself is a normal routine. I trip on sidewalks all the time. My size is very large in this country. Now put me on a stage trying an attempt at comedy, I'm there. Add a camera and I look like a fat heifer waiting to be butchered, screw off. Reality tv isn't my style of public humiliation.

Trip to the Dentist

What a day! I went to the dentist knowing that I needed a fillling. What I didn't know was that the tooth (a molar) already had a filling and it needed to be replaced. Really, not that big of a deal.

But what I didn't expect was that she would also have to take off a crown from another tooth and redo it. It wasn't fitted properly, and I knew it was a little painful, but I didn't think of it as a big deal. Of course with the language barrier, she took the fucker off without my protest. It wasn't until it was off that I realised what she wanted to do. AARRGG! Ok, so the damn thing did need to be replaced, but I wasn't planning on the added expense today. Granted, its a hell of a lot cheaper to do it here than the USA, but I'm trying to SAVE money now!

I really can't complain about the cost overall, the last time I had a crown in the USA cost about $500 or maybe a little more. Here its costing me $165 - total. For the filling, she made it a natural tooth color and it cost a total of $45.

She is a really nice dentist and gentle. She also had really cool computer imaging equipment, so she took picture of it before and after. As much as I complain about being a foreigner here, it does come with some added advantages-people want to be your friend.

After that, I went to have the hair on my upper lip removed and my eyebrows done. Here they do facial hair removal by a technique called "threading". Yes, all they use is thread. Its better than waxing because wax can burn and also removes the top layer of skin. Threading exfoliates and also pulls the follicle out, which is why its better than tweezing. Tweezing breaks the hair and that's why it grows back thicker than before. I've seen places that do it in the US. It hurts a bit on the upper lip, you automatically tear up. I also needed it done on my chin, and she ended up doing MY WHOLE FACE. It kinda hurt and left my face red and blotchy right afterward, oh the sensitive skin!

So that was my day. Exciting huh? Uh no, not really. I'm not in the best of moods right now. My spirits have been a bit low lately and I haven't been feeling very good about myself. I've generally been a bit bored. Work is so-so. It has its perks but I'm just hanging in and hoping it turns into more come October.

I'm also sad about not being able to take a trip back to the US until the Fall. I need a trip every 6 months and I'm due for one now. But I'm not taking one because of work. I really wanted to have a graduation party, I'm still not excited or particularly proud of graduating.

I have 2 things to look forward to this month: 1) My friend Caitlyn is coming to visit for 5 days at the end of the month and 2) I'm flying to London for 5 days after her visit.